Mercy Road Daily Prayer & Bible Reading ~ Monday, April 16, 2012

~ Read Leviticus 17-18

Lord God,

Reveal my idols. Expose my sin. Show me the ways I dishonor you in my life. Help me to see my own disobedience, and forgive me when I fail to live for your glory.

Forgive me, Lord, when I harden my heart to your correction. Forgive me when I refuse to submit to your word. Forgive me when "I" am my main concern, and everything I do, is motivated by how it affects me; for I know that is not pleasing to you.

I know it does not please you when I'm bitter toward those who have disappointed me. I understand that it's wrong for me to be so cynical and glum. I realize that it's not about my feelings, my fears, or my failures; however, no matter how hard I try, Lord God, I just can't seem to let it all go.

When someone offends me, I get angry. When someone hurts me, I feel bad. Though I know I'm no different and do the same things too, when someone I trust fails to live up to my hopes and expectations it's painful, Lord, even though I know that it's supposed to be all about you.

I know that my life should be about your glory. I realize that I am supposed to enjoy you. I understand that I have so much to be thankful for, so many blessings that I can't even begin to count; however, I simply continue to grumble and complain about the hardships, disappointments, struggles, trials, and pain.

It's difficult for me to say this Lord, and it scares me because it might be true, but I think I see that I am my own idol, and it's actually ME getting in the way of my relationship with you.

It's not those who hurt and disappoint that make my heart so bitter. It's not the struggles I face, or the pain that I feel, that fill me with despair. It's not the failed hopes and expectations that keep me from experiencing your blessing. IT'S ME! I do that to myself, because I am my own idol. I've made my life all about ME.

Even though I pretend that I am living for your honor, I'm truly more concerned with my own comfort, happiness, satisfaction, peace, and safety. Though I know I should be glorifying you in everything I do, in reality, I'm only willing to do so if it doesn't cost me too much, or create more work than I'd rather do. Though I'm happy to serve you in any way I can, I'm not really interested in sacrifice, suffering, or being stretched out of my comfort zone. Though I'm willing to trust you so that you can be glorified in my life, I'd rather not go through struggles, or trials, even if they lead me closer to you. I don't want to demonstrate grace and truth to those who don't treat me the way I want to be treated, because, ultimately, Lord; I am my own idol, so I think it's all about me.

Forgive me, Lord Jesus, for such foolishness and pride. Forgive me for my arrogance and sin. Help me live this day for your glory, and renew my heart again. By the power of your Spirit, for the glory of your name I pray, Amen!